Preached January 17, 2015
St. Paul’s United Church of Christ
Gerald, TX
It is good to be
in the house of the Lord today
And it is good to be back with you.
This place is starting
to feel like home,
And I like
that.
I was excited
when I learned that
This week’s text was in Psalm 139.
This is a familiar
passage to many of us,
Reassurance
of who and whose we are.
As a child, I
remember wondering what it was like
Before birth, and whether God checks
in on us
The way our parents
check in on us sometimes,
The way we
check in on our children sometimes.
And as an
expectant mother, I remember wondering
What my child would be like,
Wondering what was being
made within me.
He was part
of me and separate from me
All
at the same time.
And
while God was busy knitting my son in my womb,
I
stayed busy knitting, too.
But this passage is familiar to me for another reason,
An unfortunate
reason.
In my work with young people,
On an almost
daily basis,
I
hear things they don’t like about themselves,
Ways
they perceive themselves to be flawed and broken,
Ways
they view themselves as abject failures.
Humility is good for everyone,
And reflection
on ways we can grow and improve is good, too.
But
what I hear is self-doubt to its most dangerous degree.
I hear people almost afraid to say out loud
That they have
come to hate themselves,
That
they see themselves as a collection of mistakes and deficiencies,
Whether
genetic or by their own choices,
Rather than as
made in the image of God.
These doubts bring death, not life.
These inward
reflections bring despair, not hope.
Am I good enough?
Where and who do
I come from?
What
does that mean for what I will become?
Am
I what I am supposed to be?
That last one kills.
Am I what I am supposed to be?
And this question takes us to so many wonderings about
ourselves.
Do I look the
way I’m supposed to look?
Say
the things I’m supposed to say?
Read
the things I’m supposed to read?
Think
the things I’m supposed to think?
Am I associated
with the people I’m supposed to know,
And
do I avoid the people and places I shouldn’t know?
Do my attitude
and demeanor present me the way I should come across?
We all know these questions too well.
And many of our
favorite songs echo these same thoughts.
For the pop fans in the congregation, Hilary Duff’s “I Am” is
one example:
“I am special,
I am beautiful
I
am wonderful and powerful, unstoppable,
Sometimes
I’m miserable,
Sometimes
I’m pitiful
But
that’s so typical of all the things I am.”
Could you hear
how she is trying to
Make
sense of who she is,
But
is also juggling the pressures of
Societal
and familial expectations of
Who
she is supposed to be?
As a woman, she is to be beautiful and strong,
And
when her emotions challenge that,
She
feels even more conflict within herself,
And
the only way she can make peace with it,
Is
to accept that she is who she is.
Another example, for the country listeners, Jessica Andrews’
“Who I Am”
“I am
Rosemary’s granddaughter,
The
spitting image of my father,
And
when the day is done, my momma’s still my biggest fan,
Sometimes
I’m clueless and I’m clumsy
But
I’ve got friends that love me
And
they know just where I stand.
It’s
all a part of me,
And
that’s who I am.”
She wants to
understand herself as part of her family,
But
as herself at the same time,
Both
able and continually challenged,
Ultimately
accepting that the resolution of her feelings
Comes
in accepting that she is who she is.
And thankfully
in her situation,
The
love of her friends and family give her strength
To
embrace all of who she is in celebration.
There are
others who do not have a family like hers.
And last but not least, another for the pop fans, Lady Gaga’s
“Born This Way”:
“There’s
nothing’ wrong with lovin’ who you are,
She
said, ‘cause he made you perfect, babe.
So
hold your head up, girl, and you’ll go far
Listen
to me when I say,
I’m beautiful
in my way
Cause
God makes no mistakes
I’m
on the right track, baby,
I
was born this way.
Don’t lose yourself in regret.
Just love yourself and you’re set.
I’m on the right track, baby,
I was born this way.”
Some of you may
know that Lady Gaga released this song
In
support of LGBTQ rights
And
to publicly state her advocacy for LGBTQ people.
Do you hear the
tension here?
Knowing
who you are, but wishing you were different,
And
yet this song encourages loving who you are,
Accepting
and celebrating the things that are the “You-est”
Even
if society doesn’t understand it.
I don’t quote pop and country lyrics at you to abuse the freedom
of the pulpit,
But rather to
demonstrate that as a church and as a culture,
We
are all pressed with this question
Of
who we are,
And
whether it’s what we’re supposed to be.
We all feel
pressure,
And we all have doubts.
Our friends of the biblical text are in this journey with us.
Let us reflect
a moment on our brothers and sisters of the text.
Cain was afraid to go out from the garden.
He was the
wrong race, and he feared for his life.
God
assured him that the mark on his head would protect him,
And
sure enough Cain carried on his family line
On down to Noah
Who was very
nervous about building an arc in the desert.
He
feared that people would not understand.
“They
won’t listen to me,” he complained to God.
But
God told him to keep building,
And Noah
preserved every kind of life through
the worst storm the world had ever known.
Abraham was old.
God promised to
give him descendants as numerous as the stars.
And
Abraham was sure that he was not the right person for God’s covenant.
In
fact, Abraham lied to the Pharaoh because he didn’t trust God,
And
slept with his handmaiden (a gift from the Pharaoh)
And
was not the ideal father or husband,
And yet, God
extended a covenant to two great peoples through Abraham’s children,
Ishmael
and Isaac,
One
born through sexual surrogacy that we might now call rape
And
the other born to a woman in her eighties.
If there was ever a story that broke the mold, that is one.
But thanks be to God, I can continue.
Isaac was a weak man,
Easily tricked
by his family members.
His
son Esau was so full of pride that he married just to spite his father,
And
his son Jacob was so sneaky and conniving
that he stole from his brother
And even tried to wrestle with God.
And yet, Jacob
became Israel,
And
his twelve sons became the twelve tribes.
Now in the culture of that day, as is still true now,
The oldest son
was to inherit the father’s estate.
But
Jacob was fondest of his youngest son, Joseph,
Who
was socially awkward and despised by his brothers.
And yet, it was
his “differentness,”
His
innocence that rejected temptation and
His
ability to interpret dreams,
That
helped him become a leader of Egypt,
And
eventually saved his family from famine.
Moses was supposed to be killed.
He was the
wrong race.
He
killed an Egyptian man to protect his
people.
When
God sent him back to Egypt to rescue the Hebrew people,
He reminded God about his stutter
and that he couldn’t possibly give public speeches.
But God
provided him with a team of helpers,
And
used him to deliver the Israelite people from slavery
And
through the law, to begin the shaping of the people
Into
the covenant people of Yahweh.
Rahab was a prostitute.
She was not of
the covenant,
Or even what we might call “a seeker.”
And yet, she helped the Israelite
spies,
And
is mentioned as a foremother of Jesus in the line of David.
Hannah was barren,
Mocked by her
husband’s other wife,
And
wanted a baby so badly
That
she offered to give the baby back to God if she could just have one.
And she did,
and her son Samuel helped establish the monarchy,
first with King
Saul, and then with King David.
I assure you that King David’s early life was anything but
kingly.
He was just a
little boy playing outside
Yet
he somehow won a major military victory against the Philistines
With
a slingshot.
And once David
was in power,
He
stole Uriah’s wife, killed Uriah to cover it up,
And
couldn’t even protect his own children from
Domestic
and sexual violence.
Yet he is the
most heralded king in the Old Testament,
Considered
the direct line into which Jesus was born.
And
early church fathers called communion
The
vine of David.
Jonah was a racist coward.
He did not want
to go to Ninevah to preach,
And
he didn’t really want them to be saved,
Because
he hated them and wanted to watch God punish them.
And yet,
through his preaching,
God
saved the Assyrian people,
The
very people who had conquered the Northern Kingdom.
In fact, the Old Testament is full of prophets were a little bit
off their rockers.
Jeremiah hid
his underwear under a rock.
Isaiah
stripped off all his clothes and wandered around in the buff.
Ezekiel
did strange things with his cookware and his body hair.
But through
these and many others,
God
spoke a message of redemption and hope,
Calling
the people back to their covenant identity,
Offering
grace for those who would listen.
John the Baptist wore strange clothes
And ate strange
food,
Clung
to the outskirts of society,
Yet he prepared the way
for the coming of the Lord,
And
baptized Jesus.
Mary was a young girl,
About to get
married, and suddenly immaculately pregnant,
And
gave birth in a barn.
Thankfully
her husband believed her situation,
But
it might have been otherwise.
A little girl,
the mother of God.
Joseph was just a carpenter. He was not well-educated.
How could he
parent the Son of God?
But
he did,
And
passed his craft down to his son.
Jesus was not born in regal circumstances,
Did not have
political or military power,
Did
not come from a major city,
Or
from a family with important connections
Or
even a decent library.
He was a
country boy,
Born
to a carpenter and a virgin mother,
And
he wandered around with a rag-tag bunch of hillbillies,
Spreading
the message of the Kingdom of God.
Peter was a screw up.
He meant well,
and he made big promises,
But
he couldn’t quite get his feet where his mouth was.
The only thing
you could count on him to do was to let you down.
And
yet Jesus chose him to be the rock upon which the church would be built.
The disciples were just ordinary men,
With blue
collar jobs.
They
were not prepared to lead a worldwide organization
Or
define intricate theological concepts
Or
navigate complex political situations.
And yet, as
they obeyed what Jesus had taught them,
They
built a global church that lives to this day.
Paul was a Jew, not a Christian.
In fact, he
killed Christians.
But
Jesus stopped him, arrested his attention,
And
used him to help spread the church across the known world.
The
ministry of which continues to shape the church,
Through
the biblical text.
And I could keep going through church history.
In the second
century, Perpetua lived in North Africa,
The
mother of one child,
When
she was arrested for being a Christian,
God
provided for her baby and for her,
And
her story is the oldest account by a woman we have.
In the fifth
century, Augustine was just a deviant child.
He
was the kind of kid who stole a pear for the fun of it.
He
abandoned his lover and their child when he converted to Christianity.
And
yet his Confessions continue to be one of the most formative
Writings
in the history of Christianity.
In the
sixteenth century, Martin Luther was a lowly monk,
Huddling
on the floor because he was terrified in a rainstorm,
But
he eventually voiced his theological conviction that God wanted
A
direct, unmediated relationship with believers,
Creating
the Protestant church,
Of
which this German congregation is a descendant.
In the
seventeenth century, a small group of Puritans in England
Set
sail for a new land where they could enjoy religious liberty,
But
they had no idea what was ahead of them,
Or
how to farm or stay warm in a New England winter.
But they started a nation
That continues
to provide religious liberty to millions of people.
In the twentieth
century, a young preacher from Atlanta, Georgia
Took
his first church in Montgomery, Alabama
Where
the African Americans in his community launched a more than
Year-long
boycott of the buses that enforced
National
bus integration laws in their state
And
rallied African Americans into a
Nonviolent
direct action campaign
For
civil rights.
And
tomorrow, we will celebrate the
Martin
Luther King, Jr. National Day of Service
In
his honor, and in pursuit of
Freedom
and justice everywhere.
And now insert
your story.
You,
born to parents with ordinary circumstances,
You,
who have quirks and fears
And a complete spectrum of strengths and weaknesses.
And yet you,
whom God has called to relationship
And
to this community and to this church,
And
through whom God is spreading love and hope.
In so many ways, preaching is utter foolishness.
I am as human
as you are,
And
I bring the same baggage into this sanctuary every Sunday.
But in spite of my foolishness,
God proclaims
the message of the Kingdom through me,
And
through you,
And
through this church.
We are from Texas, for better or worse.
No matter how
much we try not to twang, some things cain’t be helped.
Sometimes
we can’t quite say what we mean,
Sometimes
we don’t look the way we wish we did,
Sometimes
we aren’t as productive as we wish we were,
Sometimes
we aren’t as certain as we wish we could be,
But we are made in the image of God,
Just as we are.
And
the very things that are at our core,
Are
the very things that best reflect God’s image in us.
These things are not to be feared or stifled or hated,
But to be
celebrated and cherished and embraced
As
part of God in us.
And however much you are not whatever it is you think you should
be
Know that you
are in good company.
Our
bible and our history are quite the motley crew of characters.
And I don’t
know if you have noticed this before,
But
the people who have all the right connections and pedigree
Are
the ones who seem oblivious to what God is doing,
The
ones who miss out on the most important things.
It’s those on
the margins, the ones who are different,
Who
really get it, and who God uses the most.
Whatever it is about you that you feel is by mistake,
Hear the word
of the Lord today.
You are made by God.
God knows you
inside and out,
Past,
present, and future.
And even with all that God knows about you,
Because of all
that God knows about you,
You
are God’s dearly loved children.
You aren’t guy or gal,
You aren’t too
this or too that,
Or
not enough this or that,
You are God’s child.
Maybe you wish you could be braver.
There is
something in your caution that the world needs,
Something
you have to teach the fearless about making wise choices.
Maybe you wish you weren’t so loud and brash.
On behalf of
the shy, we are grateful that you can give voice
To
difficult thoughts.
Maybe you wish you were thinner or taller or younger.
Your body tells
the story of your family,
Where
you have come from,
The
kinds of climates that your ancestors have learned to survive,
And
the kinds of work that your family has done.
Your gray hair is a crown of splendor,
And
your wrinkles hold tremendous wisdom,
And
your slowness allows you to be more present in the moment,
Which
is something you used to wish for.
Maybe you wish you could make music.
The joy of your
heart is beautiful music to God,
And
whether by your skill or another’s,
The
church is well-served by those who love music.
Maybe you wish you had a better memory.
But it is your
faithfulness to ask questions and beg reminders
That
keeps the Word fresh to us all.
Maybe you wish your life had taken a different course.
I know that
wish all too well.
But
when I look at the people who are in my life because of the course I took,
There
is nothing I would do differently,
For
my son is the greatest gift I’ve ever known
And
my deepest joy in this life.
Whatever road has led you to this sanctuary this morning,
Hear me,
church, when I say that God has been with you
All
along the way.
Even
in the scary parts,
And
the lonely parts,
Even
in the self-deprecating parts,
Even
the parts with doubts.
God made you
just as you are,
And
all of who you are reflects who God is
And
what God is doing through you.
As I look
across this room today,
I
see a beautiful sight.
I
see parents and grandparents and great grandparents.
I
see business owners and faithful workers and friends.
I
see generosity and hospitality and compassion.
I
see hands that aren’t afraid to get dirty,
Arms
that aren’t afraid to reach out,
And
hearts that aren’t afraid to hope.
It is
beautiful.
And
you are beautiful.
And
as I look at you,
I
see God’s love shining through you.
There
is light in your eyes,
Even
those of you with glasses and cataracts,
For
nothing can stop God’s love.
May we linger in this moment of worship.
And that thing
about yourself
That thing that you first thought of when you realized what I
was up to today,
Whatever
that is,
I encourage you to lay that before the Lord as I sing,
And maybe, just maybe,
See even that one thing as the glory
of God in you.
Just as I am, without one
plea
But that Thy blood was
shed for me
And that Thou bidst me
come to Thee
O Lamb of God, I come! I
come!
Just as I am, though tossed
about
With many a conflict, many
a doubt;
Fightings within and fears
without
O Lamb of God, I come, I
come!
Just as I am, Thou wilt
receive
Wilt welcome, pardon,
cleanse, relieve;
Because Thy promise I
believe
O Lamb of God I come, I
come!
